The shidduch
A matchmaker goes to see a poor man and says, “I want to arrange a marriage for your son.”
The poor man replies, “I never interfere in my son’s life.”
The matchmaker responds, “But the girl is Steven Spielberg’s daughter.”
“Well, in that case … ”
Next, the matchmaker approaches Steven Spielberg. “I have a husband for your daughter.”
“But my daughter is too young to marry.”
“But this young man is already a vice president at the World Bank.”
“Ah, in that case … ”
Finally, the matchmaker goes to see the president of the World Bank.
“I have a young man to recommend to you as a vice president.”
“But I already have more vice presidents than I need.”
“But this young man is Steven Spielberg’s son-in-law.”
“Ah, in that case … ”
© david minkoff
Picking and choosing
Moishe goes into a restaurant and orders potato latkes. When they arrive at his table, he does not like the look of them and changes his order to blintzes. When he is finished, he pays for the latkes and gets up to leave.
“Wait a second,” said the manager, “You haven’t paid for your blintzes.”
“What are you talking about?” Moishe replies. “Those blintzes were only an exchange. I gave you the potato latkes for them.”
“Yes, but you didn’t pay for them either.”
“Why should I pay for the potato latkes? I didn’t eat them.” n
© david minkoff
CopyrightJ, the Jewish news weekly of Northern California