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Friday April 18, 2008

Jokes

A Jewish knight

A prominent British Jew, a novelist and an intellectual, is informed that he is to be knighted. The queen’s protocol officials prepare him for the ceremony.

He is informed that he is to kneel before the queen and when she taps him on his shoulder with her sword he is to recite the following sentence in Latin: “Philosophum non facit barba. Non in solo pane vivit homo.”

However, on the day of the ceremony, the man is very nervous and, sure enough, when his turn comes to kneel before the queen, he panics in the excitement of the moment and forgets the Latin sentence. As precious seconds tick by, the only non-English words he can think of pour out of him: “Ma nishtana halaila hazeh mikol haleilot?”

Puzzled, Her Majesty the Queen turns to her protocol officer and asks: “Why is this knight different from all other knights?”

Jewish Jeopardy

A: Midrash

Q: What is a Middle East skin disease?

A: The Gaza Strip

Q: What is an Egyptian Belly Dance?

A: A classroom, a Passover ceremony and a latke

Q: What are a cheder, a seder and a tater?

A: Sofer

Q: On what do Jews recline on Passover?

Pesach haiku

On Passover we

Opened the door for Elijah

Now our cat is gone.

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